rdm_ation

 She apparently randomly speaks in third person.

( Real life? )


( Lauren's music 101 )

 Well, I'm not sure that the past few days could have been more different.

Friday was my uncle's funeral, which I won't say too much about but it was a good service, and very appropriate to him. Which is all anyone can hope for really. I love my family to pieces, I mean, who else could have a funeral that includes a rewrite of 'Long Way To The Top' as sung by his siblings and be so irreverent... but still be so meaningful.
I worked out early on that I was going to be the one that held myself together the best - and sure enough I was. I made it through with only a few tears shed in the final song, whereas the rest of my family were pretty much crying constantly. *shakes head* I don't know where I pull that from, I always feel like I cry at everything. I've had two separate people tell me that this doesn't surprise them in the slightest, and I guess it makes sense but it still felt weird.
Of course, heading to work on Saturday morning Will I? from Rent came up on shuffle and I lost it. I hadn't had enough sleep, I was emotionally drained, and ended up crying pretty much the rest of the way to work. Pretty telling huh XD

Saturday was my 21st, with masses of people. Mostly family (from Mum's side - ie all the people who are mourning my uncle) so I thought it was going to be interesting. True to form, no one else would have even realised there was anything wrong - we certainly do know how to have a good time. Speaking of, there were heaps of family members that I hadn't seen in years and years so it was great to chat for a while, even if it was only for small amounts of time.

I got home from work, got massively behind my planned schedule, and then roped Ame into helping me out with decorations as well as doing my make-up (she did an amazing job <3).
The food from the caterers was really good, as were the slices Mum and I spent all week baking if I do say so myself. I took heaps of photos, so I will try to remember to post one later on!

I got so many lovely presents, so much utterly gorgeous jewellery (including two pairs of real diamond earrings which made me flail both times THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU) and a fair bit of cash and vouchers which I am plotting how to spend now. I can finally buy a few things off my wishlists that I've had going since the start of the year. Everyone was so generous, I was a little overwhelmed.
Said wishlists are also very telling about me, I think almost every single item has something to do with music. Except the Tamora Pierce books that my brother is giving me money for (enough for an entire series fdjhksfvhfref WHY SO AWESOME?!)

I have to say, I got off pretty easily with the speeches - pebblegosling was skyping in, and she would have spoken up if she was there - and I daresay she would have embarrassed me more than my parents did. My brother made a really cute speech though.
Although, they did show this video of me singing when I was about 5 years old. I was so not in tune it made me cringe. At least I was cute... XD
Actually the most mortifying moment was completely unintentional on my Mum's part - I wanted the ground to swallow me because I know what dirty minds my friends have. My brother was doubled over he was laughing that hard... My mum was talking about how she'd at least taught me 'how to open her mouth wide' or something like that. My god. I'll leave that there now...

Today I got up at 10:30 to see those who'd stayed over off, stayed on tumblr and bookmarking fic for later, went back to bed for 3 hours despite my brother drumming, finally decided to get up, read said fic, went out for dinner with the work crowd, and now I'm back here planning on starting a TV show marathon - Doctor Who, Secret Diary of a Call Girl or Downton Abbey, I haven't quite decided yet. Pretty perfect come-down, I must say.

Bye for now!
Rdm

 I really love this song, but somehow I always forget about it. I should download it, really.

In a related note, I really need to remember the line in my title. If I'm being honest, I am struggling to hold myself together at the moment. My good old distraction techniques work for the most part, but when I actually think about some of the stuff that's going on around me I just get really overwhelmed and upset. Plus, I had a flashback last night to my days at my old school because of a line in a fanfic I read (I never know what will get to me) and so that really doesn't help.

I don't really know what else to say about my week, except that it has been ridiculously up and down at best. snuggle_monster and I had an awesome musical night at my place, even if the musical part of that night was cut rather short. Oh well, we still managed to talk until 5am. Skill, we have them.

I then proceeded to sleep through my alarm, and got pissed off at myself for a number of reasons, and kind of exploded.
snuggle_monster, I'm sorry. I actually just needed to vent, and cry, and your logical and sensible arguments went completely unheeded and I apologise if I bit your head off unreasonably. I scare myself when I get like that, because I literally just don't comprehend reason - instead I am upset for the sake of being upset. Thank goodness I don't get like that often.

I forget that I'm not expected to know what to do at all times.

Anyway, enough of that. I have so much to do but I can hardly get myself to start (let alone finish) anything, what else is new... Procrastination you suck. I just know I'm going to end up winging my Indo oral exam, I just know it. I do have English notes, I just have to look up some key words and I do have all of tomorrow. Panic hasn't set in yet because of that.
I need to practice desperately. Oh, and my violin decided that last night was a brilliant time to start buzzing, 3 weeks out from my exam. Great.
I also have a list of random errands a mile long - most of which involve cash and so have been put 'on hold' as such until I get paid this week. Better be on time of I will throw something. I'm pretty sure I'll be flat broke in about a week or so. Fun times.

OH! In better news, I have my car back!! =D
Freedom is sweet. I won't be taking it for granted again for a while. and driving like a grandma
My Dad is also amazing, and I don't have to pay him back for anything until I get a full time job. So I owe a hell of a lot of money, but it's alright for now.

One last thing, I am turning 21 in less than a month. When did that happen?
My parents have decided that I should have a big party (I was going to go with smaller events, but hey i'm not complaining if they're paying...) so I'm currently trying to work out logistics. Just another method of procrastination.

I really should go now. Really really.
So. Bye. *waves*
Rdm

 Listening to the Glee version of For Good, and sobbing. It's amazing, and this song is one of my favourites. Also a lot of memories I associate with it. <3

So, I haven't posted in a few days, I think, but it feels like a long time.
This week has pretty much consisted of me working on assignments, procrastinating said assignments, the orchestra concert (which went really really well - we pulled off Firebird!!) getting good at driving Dad's car, and just being ridiculously busy.

I am so glad I have Thursday off, even if I wasn't as productive as I could have been. No practice, but I am finally on top of these assignments. One more to do! ... Then I need to start actually studying.

Tonight, I went to see the student theatre version of 'The Witches' at uni - IT WAS SO AWESOME. Creepy as all hell. As it should be. Love.
It was so funny, while I was there I ran into B, a friend from gamelan last year - who was sitting with a friend of snuggle_monster's that I met at the sleepover a few weeks ago. It took me a while to recognise her, just because I didn't expect them to be sitting together. So random. It was good though, I went on my own so at least I had someone to chat to during interval.

I really want to reread the book now.

... I thought i had more to say. Oh well, tis bedtime! Night!
Rdm

 

I love that song so much. 

This week has been decidedly weird. There's all the drama with my car, assignments and everything - so naturally I ended up a bit stressed and strung out. A meltdown of sorts was inevitable... but I nearly made it to mid-semester break.
Yesterday I just lost it, because Ame and I had worked hard on our speech for Indo on Sunday, and thought we were good to go. Then, we read the unit guide and got really confused - so, we went and saw our teacher. Who confused us more, and I was so pissed and confused and stressed that we hadn't done it right and just ugh. I panicked, and got really upset - I hadn't done any practice then either, so I was worried about my lesson, and the fact that I had to go to work. We ended up skipping my second Indo class and I went and used the music room near her flat (she lives on campus) to play and make myself feel better. She also gives the most amazing massages, seriously I felt like I could move my shoulders properly for the first time in a long while. <3 Thank you.

Then, I get home last night and was told that one of my great-uncles has passed away. I'm sad, but more because I'm struggling to remember him. It's strange to think that had it been the same relation on my mum's side, I'd be devastated but because it's on Dad's and we really don't see them much I'm not. Sending my love out to the family though.

And that brings me to now. Still procrastinating fixing this speech and doing the powerpoint (even though it's tomorrow eek) and wondering just where time goes on Tuesday mornings. I'll work it out, but for now I'll leave this here.
Rdm

PS. It sounds strange because I do see them a bit, but I miss my friends. As in, I miss spending decent amounts of time just hanging out. 

It's weird how the human body/mind reacts to certain things.

Today I ran into the back of another car, and boy did it scare the crap out of me. I'm perfectly okay, so don't you all fret. I was stopped in traffic, and we started moving, and then I zoned out for a second and bang. I feel like such an idiot right now. Luckily the guy whose car I ran into was really nice, and we just exchanged details and he was thinking straight whereas I really wasn't.
I'm still a little shaken up, even though this happened in the middle of the day, which is what the first line is referring to. Mostly now I'm just stressed because I rely on my car a LOT. Like, uni on Friday - I think I can use my brother's car, but the last thing I want to do right now is borrow someone else's car. OR for work on Saturday, what do I do about that? And when the hell am I going to find the time to take my car to get quotes for repairs and UGH.

Not to mention that it was completely my fault, so I will have to pay for the damage. *headdesk*

I was actually having a really good morning too. Indo was fun, my lesson was actually really good - goes to show that a little good practice > lots of dodgy practice. I also headed into the city to study with sine_animo for a while, which helped cheer me up a bit even if we didn't really talk much.
Thank goodness I have no plans and no obligations tomorrow though.

Rdm

 I really need to stop procrastinating. But it's too much fun XD

Ah, Chris Colfer amuses me. His responses in this interview are awesome.

Some snippets:
Q: “Do you think you’ll ever do a voice over for an animated feature? Cause I think you have the most amazing voice to do one.”
A: Oh yes! Can I be a Sea Monkey in Finding Nemo 2?SEAMONKEY. LOL XD

He also played Chip in a production of Beauty and the Beast - that would have been freaking adorable.

Q: “What’s your favorite gift from a fan?”
A: It would be impossible to choose one, but I recently got a handmade stuffed Llama holding a Golden Globe and thought it was the cutest thing I had ever seen.
Um. I want one.

( A week's worth of reality... )

 Wow guys, the response to my last post was incredible! Thank you!
<3

I've actually been meaning to post an actual update for about a week now, but then real life actually did get in the way. A lot of my time has been taken up by this production, but I now have a couple of days off which is nice. I ended up going to see the New Years Eve fireworks with pebblegosling, wolfielove, a_new_divide and a couple of other friends, which was great fun. Very exciting, as I had never brought in the new year in the city before. So many people! Can totally understand why we've never been now, Mum hates crowds.

( The randomness that is my life. Again. )

And now - onto the meme! Which I have been neglecting, mainly because this part of it is difficult for me. I am the sort of person who traces each event in my life to who I am now. Anything that I would change, would change who I am now dramatically, and honestly, I like where I am in life right now.

( Six things )

And that's it for today! I have a fair few plans for February, but almost none for the next few weeks - which is a nice change of pace. I won't get any extra shifts at work, January is dead, so I think I'll sit at home, watch movies, catch up with harpisan (hopefully!) organise my music to go onto the ipod I just bought off snuggle_monster, fixing up my lj tags (going to take me a while...), go shopping because I can, and the like.
Rdm

 It's been a weird couple of days.

( Actual update! )

Recall it?

( Awesomely trippy movie, rainstorms, and a video that simply made me laugh )